Coffee
by Silverstonedragon
Summary: This is what happens when you mix coffee with the members of Akastuki, and other Naruto characters.Rated for Hidan's mouth. For those of you who would like to request a situation, please do. Just tell me who, whether it's coffee withdraw, or a coffee hype, and a plot idea. It you don't have a plot idea, I'll do my best to make one.
1. Deidara and Tobi

**I do not own Naruto.**

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><p>Deidara sat in the kitchen of one of the many Akatsuki hideouts. He and Tobi were staying in this one alone after a mission. Tobi was moving around the kitchen, cooking dinner. It was his turn to cook, and Deidara was happy about that. He could cook, but liked Tobi's cooking better. As he watched, Tobi began to hum a tune Deidara though he knew. "What are you humming Tobi?" Deidara asked.<p>

"Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden. It was on the radio, and now Tobi can't get it out of his head." Tobi said.

"Oh. I thought I knew it. That's a pretty good song. Do we have any coffee?" Deidara asked.

"Senpai wants coffee? Tobi thought it made him jittery?" Tobi asked, turning to face Deidara. Tobi was not wearing his mask, but had a jutsu to make him look younger.

"It does, but I want some." Deidara said. Coffee didn't really make him jittery, but it did make him hyper.

"Tobi doesn't think Senpai should drink any. Tobi thinks if Senpai drinks coffee he will bounce off the walls. Senpai will be even more hyper than Tobi is." Tobi said, smiling and turning back to the pasta on te stove.

"I don't care. I want coffee. Were is the coffee Tobi. Tell me, or I will blow you up." Deidara warned.

"It's on the top self in the closet, but don't say Tobi didn't warn you Senpai." Tobi said.

Deidara got the instant coffee, and made himself, and Tobi a cup. He gave Tobi his cup, and drank his own down. After a few minutes, Deidara went to watch TV. Tobi waited a few more minutes, then hid the knifes, including all the kunai, ans shuriken, and Deidara's clay. After three minutes, Deidara came bouncing into the room, all hyped up on caffine. "Hey Tobi, have you seen my clay?" He asked, unaware of the fact that he's a hyper as his partner.

"No Tobi has not seen Senpai's clay." Tobi replied, removing the pasta from the stove eye and straining it. He added the pasta to the still cooking sauce, and waited for the pasta to finish cooking in the sauce.

"You totally have seen it. You know where it's at, don't you?" Deidara went on with his talking until the pasta was done, and that took about ten minutes, Tobi would have to talk to Kakuzu about getting a new stove for this hideout.

"Tobi has not seen Senpai's clay." Tobi replied, "Or the knifes." He added when Deidara said something about them being gone too. Deidara bounced out of the room. "Don't doo anything that would take too long, dinner will be ready in a few minutes Senpai." Tobi called after the blonde bomber.

"Whatever Tobiiiiiiii!" Deidara yelled.

Tobi hated it when Deidara drank coffee, and knew he would not be eating dinner until later that night. In about an hour, Deidara would crash, and passout wherever he was, and Tobi woulod have to find him, and put him to bed. Sasori had to do the same thing a few times, as did almost every momber of Akatsuki. Zetsu, Pein, and Konan had not had to deal with it.

About five minutes later, Tobi pulled the bread out of the oven, made himself a plate, and ate it. An hour later, he went to find Deidara. After searching the whole hideout, and not finding him, Tobi went to where he hid Deidara's clay. He did not find the clay, and ran outside to find Deidara. There was a loud explosion, and Tobi found Deidara, knocked out from the blast, laying next to a rive behind the hideout.

Shaking his head, Tobi picked Deidara up, and took him to his room. After setting him on the bed, Tobi went to get rid of all the coffee in the hideout. He could live without coffee if it meant deidara would destroy half the hideout with clay. Tobi went to look at the damage. Half the hideout was on fire. After putting the fire out, Tobi saw that he would have to forget asking Kakuzu for a stove, and get money to fix the hideout. Kakuzu would more likely give him money for that anyway. Kakuzu knew that if someone saw the damage, thay would start thinking, and getting nosy.

Tobi sent a bird to Kakuzu, and the leader, explaining what happened. Kakuzu would arive the next day with Hidan and supplies to fix the hideout, and all four of them would fix it quickly. Until then, Tobi went back into the kitchen, fixed Deidara a hige plate of pasta, and bread, then cleaned everything up. After cleaning the entire kitchen, and the bathroom, Tobi went to lay down on the couch, since his room was on the half of the hideout Deidara had blown up. Fallinf asleep, Tobi laughed at the thought of making Deidara fix the hideout by himself. He knew Kakuzu, and Hidan would be okay with that. Tobi was also thankful for the fact that Deidara blowing the hideout up, was not the worse thing he could do hyped up on caffine, and that was why he hid the knifes, since he had stabbed Hidan a few times after drinking coffee. Deidara could get downright homicidal. He was surprised he had not killed Itachi after drinking coffee, which comes to show, he doesn't hate the Uchiha as much as he claims.

As Tobi drifted off the sleep, Deidara forgot all that had happened, and would wake up confused, and upset. He would also want more coffee, but Tobi would not let him have anymore. Even if it made Deidara mad, Tobi didn't want to die.

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><p>Short, and sweet. This story was some random thing I thought of, and hoped it would help with the writers block I have. Sometimes I hate plot bunnies. They never leave me alone, and they multiply. Do you know, I thought of something the other day, and put it on my profile. Deidara and Tobi totally belong together. Their names have the same ending. If you don't understand, review, and I will be glad to tell you. If you do understand, kudos to you, here's an imaginary cookie. Please review, and tell me what you think. I might do another chapter if I get enough review. The next chapter could be about another member of Akatuki, and how they react to coffee.<p> 


	2. Kakuzu and Hidan

Kakuzu and Hidan were walking through a village near their hideout, heading back from Tobi, and Deidara's. "I can't believe Tobi let that damned blonde have coffee. He knows how he gets." Hidan said.

"We all know all know how he gets, but Tobi can handle himself, no matter how stupid he acts." Kakuzu replied. "And speaking of coffee, I haven't had any today." He then added.

"Then let's get some. I'll even pay for it if you don't want to pay for it." Hidan said. He knew how Kakuzu got when he didn't get his coffee in the morning. THe had watch Deidara fix the hideout all night, and started for home about six. It was now about nine, and Kakuzu was already starting to get cranky from lack of coffee. Hidan looked into his pocket, but found no money, he had left his wallet laying on the dresser at the hideout. "Shit, I forgot my wallet. I have no money with me." He said.

"I'll pay for it since you offer, then pretend to not have any money." Kakuzu said grumply.

"I never fucking said I didn't have any fucking money, I said I left my damn wallet on the damn dresser when you drug me out of the damn bed to take money to Tobi for the fucking repairs." Hidan said, using for curse words than normal.

"Whatever." Kakuzu said. He stopped and looked around, but found me place that would sale coffee. "I guess I have to wait until we get back to the hideout to get coffee. There are no stores around her that have already made coffee." Kakuzu said.

"Fine then, let's hurry." Hidan said. He wasn't afraid of Kakuzu when he didn't get coffee, but he didn't like being around him. As they walked, Hidan didn't keep quiet, even thought he knew Kakuzu was getting mad at him. Kakuzu lashed out at Hidan sooner than Hidan had thought he would, and ended up without his head. "Hey you bastard, put my head back on." He yelled.

"Will you shut the fuck up?" Kakuzu asked.

"Fine, I'll stop talking." Hidan said, looking at him body, which was about five feet away from him head.

Kakuzu grabed Hidan's head by the hair as ruffly as possible, and stitched it back to his body, causing as much pain as possible, even though he knew Hidan would love the pain, being the masochist he was. "There you big baby." He whispered.

"Thanks." Hidan replied.

"Welcome." Kakuzu sneared.

The walked the rest of the way in silence, but Kakuzu was still really mad. They walked into the hideout, and Hidna ran straight for the kitchen to make coffee. Hidan opened the closet, and all the cupboards. "Oh no." He whispered.

"What's wrong?" Kakuzu asked, walking into the kitchen without his mask, and cloak.

"I'll be back soon to make you some coffee." Hidan said, slowly moving past Kakuzu, ans toward the door.

"Why are you not making it now?" Kakuzu asked, he was not so good at making coffee himself.

"We're out, so I'm going to get some more at the store." Hidan ran up the stairs to retrieve him wallet, but didn't think he would need it. He then ran out the door, and toward the village they were just in. Running into the closest store, and staright for the isle that had the coffee got him a few strange looked. "What are you staring at fuck faces?" He bit out. All thew people quickly turned away, and left at seeing the red clouds on Hidan's cloak. Hidan found the coffee, and went to the counter to pay for it, but the owner had ran out with the rest of the people, so Hidan ran out of the store without paying so he could get back to the hideout to make coffee for his cranky partner.

Hidan burst through the door, and ran to the kitchen, ignoring the grumpy man sitting at the table reading a newspaper. Hidan put the water inthe coffee pot, then added the coffee anf turned it on. Hidan sighed, and plopped down at the table with Kakuzu. "Coffee will be ready soon." He said.

"Stop talking." Kakuzu said.

"All I fucking said was that the fucking coffee would be ready soon." Hidan bit back.

"And I said to shut up." Kakuzu said, lashing out, taking Hidan's head off. "I don't want to hear a word from you until I get coffee." He added.

Hidan's head mumbled something that sounded ruffly like 'Fucking bastard', which Kakuzu ignored because he wasn't sure. "Put my head back on my body so I can finish the coffee, or you'll have to deal without." Hidan said, not cursing for a change.

Kakuzu huffed, but picked Hidan's head up, and sewed it back onto his body. Hidan sighed, and rolled his neck around, getting the kinks out. He hated it when someone cut his head off. Hidan walked to the coffee maker just as it beeped, tell everyone that the coffee was done. Hidan reached into the cabnit, and got out a coffee cup. Putting the coffee into the cup, Hidan added very little sugar, and milk, not creamer as he would have for his own. Setting the cup in front of the miser after stiring it, Hidan went back to make his own cup, adding a lot of sugar, and a spoonful of creamer.

Hidan stood at the counter to drink is cup, and looked out the window. Kakuzu silently walked up behind him, and put his arms around his waist. Hidan jumped. "What the fuck Kakuzu." He said.

"I'm sorry I cut your head off twice Love." He said, as he usually did when he cut Hidan's head off because he hadn't had coffee.

Hidan turned around in Kakuzu's grasp. "I know. I forgive you. I shouldn't have bothered you, knowing you hadn't had coffee yet." Hidan said, placing a chaste kiss on Kakuzu's lips, then going outside to train. Kakuzu stood there, then followed Hidan outside to train as well.

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><p><strong>I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Sorry for all the cursing, but we all know how Hidan is. I can't help but add yaoi to this. I love this couple so much. What couple should I do next?<strong>


	3. Itachi and Kisame

Kisame stepped into the living area of the hideout he shared with his partner, Itachi. Itachi was not there, so Kisame went to the kitchen. "Itachi." He called out.

Itachi flashed into the room from who knows where. "What?" He asked.

"What do you want for breakfast?" Kisame asked.

"Hn." Itachi mumbled, stepping into the small foryer that was just off the back entrance to the kitchen. He took his Akatsuki coat off and hung it up next to Kisame's.

Kisame knew what Itachi meant by his mumble. Kisam eopened the fridge, and got out some eggs. Scrambling them, Kisame also got some bacon out of the fridge. Frying the bacon was first, then the eggs. Kisame put some bread into the broiler, and toasted it up. Kakuzu was too cheap to by a toaster, and made them use the stove, but that was okay. Itachi had disappeared, but Kisame knew where he was. He was most likely in the library, reading all he could before his eyesight left him completely. Kisame wished there was something he could do about his lover's eyesight, but also knew there was nothing he could do.

Kisame opened the closet door to look for the coffee. Not seeing it, Kisame almost had a heart attack. "No coffee." He whispered, then almost jumped out of his skin when Itachi appeared beside him, having already activated his mangekyou sharingan. Kisame freaked when he heard Itachi anounce his jutsu. He tried to get away, but Itachi caught him first.

Kisame opened his eyes to find himself in a dark red room. He knew where he was. He knew he was inside Itachi's mangekyou sharingan. Sighing, Kisame waited for whatever Itachi dicided to put him through for the next forty-eight hours. Kisame heard what sounded like saw blades. It was the same thing Itachi always put him through. Itachi did this everytime they were out of coffee. Briefly, Kisame wondered if Itachi would do anything different, but put the thought away when he heard the sound get louder. Jumping up just in time for the saw blades to fly by him, Kisame jerked his head around, waiting for the next thing to happen. He knew what was most likely coming up next, but was only slightly surprised to find it was not what he was waiting for.

He heard the shuriken before he saw them, or felt them. They were faster than he thougth they would be, and a few of them landed in his chest, not deep enough to kill him if it were real, but deep enough to really hurt. He knew it would be a long two days.

A few hours later, Kisame was sitting on the ground, bleeding from a couple dozen wounds. Breathing heavily, he waited for whatever was to come next. "Why does he always do this? I can't go get coffee if I'm here." He said to himself. Some kunai flew past his head. "Is Itachi going easy on me now?" He asked himself.

Kisame closed his eyes as a wave of pain came over him, then the pain was gone. Kisame opened his eyes, and saw he was sitting in the Kitchen again. "Go get coffee." Itachi said, leaving the room.

Kisame got up and ran to the store to get the weasel's beloved coffee. Returing a few minutes later, he started a pot. Itachi walked into the kitchen when it was done. "There you go, coffee. I wish you wouldn't use your mangekyou sharingan on me when we run out of coffee." He said.

"I'm sorry." Itachi said, shocking the shark like man. "I love you."

"I love you too." Kisame leaned in to kiss Itachi. Itachi blushed, and turned his head away. "Do you not want to kiss me?"

"I do, but." Itachi didn't finish.

"But what?" Kisame asked.

"I was so mean to you, and I also don't understand why you would want to be with someone who is going to die soon." Itachi said.

"You are always mean to everyone, and do you think I will live much longer?" Kisame said, putting his hand under Itachi's chin, turning his head around, and giving him a firm kiss. Itachi couldn't stop the moan that made it's way out of his throat. Kisame pulled away. "Well, do you?" He asked.

"Do I what?" Itachi asked.

"Nevermind. The coffee is ready." Kisame said. He knew a kiss would make him forget all about the death thing.

"Thank you." Itachi said. Kisame was the only one Itachi was polite, and nice to.


	4. Deidara and Zetsu

Zetsu decided to be mean to Tobi, and he knew the best way to do that. He walked into the kitchen, and started making coffee. Tobi and Deidara were staying in his hideout for a little while, and Zetsu was bored. He had heard about what coffee did to Deidara, but wanted to see it first hand. He, Pein, and Konan were the only ones who had not seen how Deidara acted with coffee.

When the coffee was done, Zetsu poured a cup, and went to find the blonde bomber. He found Deidara in the living room, making a non-explosive clay statue. "Here Deidara. **Have a drink.**" His two halves said, hadning the cup to Deidara.

"Thanks Zetsu. I ain't had a cup of coffee in a long time. Tobi won't let me have any for some reason." Deidara said, taking the cup, and draining it.

"I wonder why. **It's so cruel to not let you.**" Zetsu laughed, and went to find Tobi.

Tobi was in the kitchen, looking at the coffee pot. "You didn't give Senpai coffee, did you Zetsu-Sama?" He asked, looking at Zetsu.

"So what...** if we did.**" Zetsu said.

Tobi was silent. He started to walk away so he wouldn't kill the plant man. "You'll regret it, believe me. I'm leaving, be back in a few hours when he's out." He said, not refering to himself in the third party, which kind of worried Zetsu.

"It can't be that bad." White Zetsu said. **"Can it?"** Black Zetsu added.

A few minutes later, Zetsu heard a strange noise. Deidara came running into the room, all hyped up. "Thanks for the coffee Zetsu." He said, hugging the spy.

"What was... **that noise?**" Zetsu asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Do you want to play a game with me? It will be fun. We can play hide and seek, or monopoly, or twister, or tag, or uno, or, or, or." Deidara was running out of things to play.

"No Deidara... **we don't want to play a game.**" Zetsu said.

Deidara whined. "Why not. No one wants to play with me. Tobi is not here right now, and you are the only one who can play with me. Please play with me. Pleeeeeeaaaaaaassssssssse play with me."

Zetsu was already starting to regret what he had done. He shouldn't have given him the coffee after all. The phrase 'Curiosity killed the cat' ran throught Zetsu's mind. "No we will not play with you." The white half said.

"Aw, why not. That's no fun. I want to play. Play with me. Play with me. Play with me. Play with me." Deidara started to repeat this over and over again. Zetsu fought the urge to kill the blonde man. Zetsu thought he heard two other voices talking as well, but brushed it off.

Zetsu left the room, but Deidara bounced after him, still repeating the same thing over and over again. Zetsu swung around to hit Deidara, but the bounce blonde man moved out of the way. "Stupid... **blonde.**" He said.

Deidara froze. "I'm not stupid!" He yelled, pulling out a kunai, and going after Zetsu.

Zetsu ran for his life. He would have sank into the floor, but that would have taken too long, and Deidara would get him. Deidara started to repeat, I'm not stupid, over and over again, swinging the kunai at Zetsu.

Tobi was secretly still in the hideout, having not left before. He wanted to see how Zetsu reacted to Deidara being hyped up. Tobi had also secretly given Deidara more coffee, to make it worse. He was going to give Zetsu what he deserved. He laughed to himself. He liked to Zetsu running away from Deidara. It was funny.

Deidara chased Zetsu around the hideout for almost two hours, until Deidara crashed. Tobi swooped down to catch him before he fell on the kunai, and killed himself.

"You were here... **the whole time?**" Zetsu asked.

"What makes you say that Zetsu-Sama. Tobi told you He would be back in a few hours, didn't he?" Tobi looked Zetsu up and down. Deidara had landed a few blows, but it wasn't serious. "Tobi warned you." He said, carring Deidara away.

**This is sort of like what someone wanted me to do. I hope you all like it. Sorry for oocness, but I like it that way sometimes.**


	5. Deidara and Zetsu 2

**I do not own Naruto.**

Zetsu was walking throught the hideout, thinking of something to do. it was one of those rare moments that he had nothing to do for the criminal group. Pein was away, and so was almost everyone else. Deidara and Tobi were in the hideout as well. Zetsu shivered thinking about the last time he was alone with the duo. Deidara had almost killed him.

Speaking of the blonde bomber, Deidara came bouncing into the room. It was apparent he was hyped up on coffee, and Zetsu was starting to freak out, r at least the black half was. The black half was the one who got the worse of Deidara's blows the last time. "**Where did you get coffee?**" He asked Deidara.

"I found it in the kitchen." Deidara said, then bounced out of the room.

"**What do we do?**" The black half asked the white.

"We could give him more coffee." The white half said.

"**What?**" The black half exclaimed. "**More coffee? Are you nutts?**"

"We could lace it with sleeping meds." The white half said.

"**The might work.**" The black hald said as they walked into the bathroom, then to the kitchen. They put some of the meds into a cup of coffee, and disolved it. "**Hey Deidara. Would you like more coffee?**" the black half called.

Deidara came bouncing into the room. "Thanks." He said. He took the cup, drank it, and almost instantly passed out on the floor. Zetsu picked him up, and put him in his bed, leaving the blonde alone.

"Zetsu-Sama, where is Deidara-Senpai?" Tpbi asked. "Tobi has been looking everywhere for him."

"He's asleep on his bed. **He got a hold of some coffee. **So we gave him some laced with sleeping meds." Zetus said.

"You did?" Tobi said.

"Yep." Zetsu walked away.

Tobi smirked behind his mask. _Wait until I tell Deidara about this._ He thought.

A few hours later, Deidara woke up to Tobi sitting beside his bed. "What am I doing here? Why are you here?" He asked.

"Tobi thought Deidara-Senpai should know that Zetsu-Sama put him to sleep with sleeping meds." Tobi said, standing and leaving the room.

Deidara sat there for a minute to let it all sink in. "Zetsu." He was fuming, and he ran from the room, looking for the plant man. "Zetsu!" He yelled out.

"What do...** You want?**" Zetsu asked, coming up to Deidara.

"Why you." Deidara yelled, poulling a kunai out, and once more chasing the man around the hideout. "I'm going to kill you for doing that to me."

"**How did he find out?**" The black half asked the white half.

"I don't know, just run." Zetsu ran out of the hideout, with Deidara following right behind. Zetsu heard a loud laugh, and knew just who had told Deidara about the sleeping pills. "_**We'll kill you for this Tobi.**_" Both half yelled at the same time.

Tobi laughed even harder, knowing Zetsu coulld do a thing to him.

**Short, and a little closer to what the request was than the one before this one. Hope you like it.**


	6. Deidara, Itachi, Pein, and Zetsu

**I do not own Naruto or any of the characters. This is a request for ilovemyboys. I hope you like it, and it meets your request. **

Deidara was standing in the kitchen of the main hideout. Tobi was not there, said he was on a solo mission, which was strange, but Deidara didn't mind. He was searching through the cabnits, looking for the one thing Tobi, and everyone else, never let him have, coffee. Deidara knew there was some there becuase Itachi and Kakuzu couldn't live without their coffee. He finally found it in top of the closet. He climbed up the wall, and got it down. He then went to the coffee maker, and put the coofee grounds in. He added water, and waited. Minutes later, and poured himself a cup of the steaming caffine drink.

Zetsu walked into the room, and almost had a heart attack. The last time Deidara had drank coffee, Zetsu had almost died. He was just about to back out of the room, then he had an idea. He reached into his cloak, and pulled out a small bottle of vodka. He had been meaning to give it to Tobi. He walked over to Deidara. "Hey Deidara. **Would you like something...** to spike up you coffee a little?" The two halves asked.

Deidara thought for a minute. "Sure." He said.

Zetsu laughed to himself and handed the bottle to Deidara. "Drink...** as much as... **you like." He said, leaving the room through the floor.

Deidara spent the better part of the day drinking vodka spiked coffee. After the bottle was gone, Deidara had gone through almost three pots of coffee, and was already bouncing off the walls. The vodka had yet to kick in because of the caffine from the coffee. Deidara ran through the hideout, bounce all over the place.

Zetsu hadn't stayed behind to see what would happen. With his luck, Deidara would end up trying to kill him again, and he was afraid this time the bomber would not miss or tire out before he job was done.

Deidara stopped in front of a door. He knew just who's door it was. He opened it, and slipped in. The figure on the bed was fast alseep. Deidara crept up to him, and just stared.

A minute leter, the person in the bed felt someone watching him. He opened his eyes, and almost jumped out of his skin. Itachi was shoacked to see Deidara staring at him with wide eyes. He sat was in the bed. "What do you want you art freak?" He asked. Deidara cocked his head to the side and kept staring. "I asked you a question." Itachi said a few minutes later when the staring was getting annoying.

All of a sudden Deidara lunged forward and wrapped the weasle in a hug before said man could do anything about it. Itachi nearly screamed when they made contacted. He wasn't expecting the other man to hug him. He was about to use his Sharingan when Deidara let go, and ran. Itachi ran after him for a few minutes, but gave up when he realised he wasn't going to catch him. By then, they had made it to the kitchen and Itachi saw the remains of the coffee. Seeing this, he ran back to his room, and hid under the bed, afraid Deidara would try and kill him.

By now, the coffe was starting to wear off, and the vodka was starting to take affect. Deidara strode right into Pein's office, and sat down at his desk. He started to play with the things on it. Pein walks in to see the blonde bomber mimicking him and Konan using pencils, showing no respect for anything or anyone. "What are you doing in here?" He demanded.

Deidara looked up and smiled. "Leader-Sama!" He exclaimed, throwing the pencils down, and propong his feet on the leader's desk. "What's up?" He said, his speach slurded from the vodka.

"Are you drunk Deidara?" Pein asked. He was confused. He had never seen Deidara drunk before. The other members, yes, but not Deidara. Deidara usually held his alcohol really well, so if he was this drink, then he must had had a lot of something very strong.

Deidara stodd up on wobbly feet. "Of course not Leader-Sama. That would be very unprofessional." He slured, walked very ungracfully over to the leader. He then drped himself all over his. "has anyone ever told you how cute you are Leader-Sama?" He slurled.

Pein could smell the vodka on his breath and made a mental note to beat some sense into Zetsu later. He could also smell coffee on his breath too. So that was how Zetsu managed to get Deidara to drink so much Vodka, he spiked his coffee. "Oky Deidara. Maybe you should go to bed now." He said, trying to put athority into his voice.

Deidara laughed. "You're even cuter when you're trying to boss me around." He slured, laughing again.

Deidara began to fall, and Pein caught him. The blonde bomber was still awake, and spouting stuff about how cute certain people, not just Pein now, were, like so super cute, in exactly those words. Pein had to suport Deidara into order to get him to his room. Before they got to his room though, Deidara passed out, and Pein had to carry him the rest of the way. He hoped to whatever god, besides him, that was listening, that none of the other members saw any of this.

He put Deidara in the bed, and left, leaving the bomber in hos clothes. He went back to his office to clean it up. A few minutes later there was a small knock on the door. Pein was slightly afrain that it was Deidar agian. "Who is it?" He asked.

"It's me Leader-Sama." Itachi said.

"Oh, come in Itachi." Pein called.

Itachi opened the door and looked around. "I take it Deidara has been through here?" He guessed. "I came to warn you that he has been drinking coffee." He added.

"Not just coffee. Zestu must have given his vodka, his breath reaked with the stuff. He was in here, and I ended up having to help him back to his room. Halfway there, I had to carry him becuase he passed out on me." Pein said. He didn't mind of Itachi found out about it. Itachi has had to do the same things with Kisame before.

"Yeah, well. He cam einto my bedroom, watched me sleep for a few minutes, then hugged me when I got up." Itachi said.

"He must have been hyped up on coffee then. He was using pencils to imitate me and Konan a few minuted ago. Then he started calling me cute, and then started calling everyone in the whole Akatsuki cute." Pein said. Itachi and Pein both shuddered, and went to bed.

The next day, Deidara woke up with a hangover, and unable to remeber anything that happened the day before. The last thing he remembered was looking for coffee. He wondered if he ever found it, then he wondered how he had gotten in bed, and how he managed to get drunk. He tried asked Itachi and Pein, but neither of them wanted to talk about it.

Tobi returned that day, and Itachi told him about what had happened. He was instantly thankful he had been away on a solo mission at the time. He felt really sorry for the others. He also made a mental note to have a talk with Zetsu later in the day, knowing full well that he was the only one who could have given Deidara the vodka in the first place.

Zetsu was told of what happened, and laughed like carazy for hours. Afterward, he was yelled at, and beaten up by both Pein and Tobi. He said he was all worth it in the end.

**I hope you guys like it and all. Please feel free the send me requests.**


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